“When you're taught to love everyone, to love your enemies, then what value does that place on love?”—Marilyn Manson
I’m no Marilyn Manson fan. Though I do think he is both intelligent and articulate. Here, he is making a point. If we just throw love out to whoever, is it really valuable? If it’s valuable, shouldn’t we be more discriminating in who we love? I think his point makes some sense. What comes to mind is preachers who are very involved in their congregation, but neglect their families. St. Paul talks to us about that. If you can’t maintain your family, you have no business trying to run a church community. The needs of your immediate family need to be met. You can’t serve others at the expense of your family. To the responsibility of raising your children properly is a grave sin. Unfortunately, it is all too common. I think it is one of the reasons preacher’s kids have such a bad reputation, though there are other factors, of course.
My first reaction to this quote was to say that it is true if love is a limited commodity, but as I thought about it, it is limited, in a sense. By this I mean that we can only really invest in a limited amount of people because both our time and energy are limited. We have to choose wisely. However, we can love others without restriction in the broader sense of being concerned for their well being, and working to help improve it. We can give money to support charity (though this is limited by our available funds); we can volunteer at shelters; we can teach adults or children how to read; we can reconcile with those who are estranged from us; we can vote in ways that take the interests of the most people into account; we can use our time better so that we can do more to help others.
To teach children, or adults for that matter, to love everyone places the highest value on love. Love is not like money. If there is more of it, there is no inflation which causes it to have less value.
Love is so important because others are important, despite their stupidity, arrogance, and brokenness. Loving others is less concerned with love as an abstract thing, and more concerned with others as God’s children, and our brothers and sisters. We love because others are worth loving, despite themselves, despite ourselves.
The problem with the church and society is not that we are too free in our love, but that we are not free enough. How many people do you know that have broken past the insider/outsider binary? We tend to love those like us, and hate those who are different. Christians have not really been an exception to this, though Jesus called us to be. As he told his disciples, we must be better than the pagans, and love those who do not love us. Only when we do this will we be like God.
Such love is not a smug liberal self-serving love that assuages our guilt while remaining ultimately apathetic, nor is it a conservative love that is judgmental, loving in name only while secretly hateful. It works for the good of its object. As Christians, we must always work for the good of all creation, not just our own good. We must put aside hate, and look past difference. We must see with God’s eyes. We must be willing to put aside our negative feelings and selfish interests, and live compassionately. Every person is a son or daughter of some one. Every person is loved, if by no one else, then at least by God. And every person is broken and in need of kindness. We must be ready and willing to give them kindness, even when it hurts. We must not limit love.